Ode to the Steroid

There is no moss on the backs of those who’ve used it.

They look like they’d be good to eat.

They are muscular and juicy,

like a young cow.

They are strong and droll.

They are like big, happy potatoes.

They do not have love handles,

or love, period.

They have the appearance of a man,

but their minds have been altered.

They are puffy and meaty,

like a piece of beef.

They are happy and playful,

like a puppy.

They are like a potato,

but not a sweet potato.

They are swollen and flaccid,

like a giant piece of tri-tip.

They are like a sirloin steak,

but they don’t have a bone.

They are like the kind of steak

you cook on a grill.

They are like a large piece of steak,

but not a steak that is too large.

They are like a potato,

but not a sweet potato.